War

My arms are lonely

Looking for comfort

In all the wrong places.

Searching for a glance

But it slowly flitters away.

I should know by now

That you do not need me

As I need you

I am an afterthought

You are my firstthought.

I am becoming invisible

My happiness discarded

I cannot share myself with you

Since you will never comprehend

All the thorns that continue

Bleeding inside me

And yet my heart

keeps finding new ways to love you.

I cannot stop

No matter how hard I try

So, my heart brokenly

Picks up the shards.

For as long as you are near

I am unfamiliar to myself.

My silence is the quiet

Before the storm

But why do we have to fill every silence?

Silence is being at peace

With your thoughts

But I am constantly

At war with them.

Eternal Light

a hurricane of emotions

rush through the valleys

of my heart.

a volcano of unsaid words

remain buried deep inside

threatening to erupt.

not knowing why my heart

has become the victim

of all these emotions

I rush towards the

small beacon of light

creeping its way

in the darkness

and I find You.

bursting into a million stars

I become the light.

Ya Rubb, Ya Rubb, Ya Rubb.

the entire world is

pulling me into darkness

but you have shown me

Eternal Light

and that is the only thing I seek.

Let Your Emotions Guide You

Emotions are fickle little things. They flitter everywhere and nowhere at the same time. These emotions are majestic beings, things beyond our imagination, things we cannot control.

We burst out crying or burst into laughter. We burst many times in the day, our faces contorting in joy or sadness. Either way, we are bursting due to these imposing beings called emotions that are way way way beyond our control.

Burst into joy

Or in sadness

But always remember

The bursting.

Emotions are pure little things. They are an expression of our state. They enter our heart and leave just as quickly. They are temporary, just as we are. They journey through us, creating their own paths.

We must remember to feel them. To let them pass through our veins and enter our hearts, even the most painful emotion. I say this because to feel is to be human and we must always remember to be human. The moment we stop ourselves from feeling, the moment we start to feel numb, is a moment of great power that can lead us towards destruction.

Emotions come in many forms and as the Thirteenth-Century Persian Poet Rumi says, quite famously, in his poem ‘The Guest House’:

“This being human is a guest house.

Every morning a new arrival.

A joy, a depression, a meanness,

some momentary awareness comes

As an unexpected visitor.

Welcome and entertain them all!

Even if they’re a crowd of sorrows,

who violently sweep your house

empty of its furniture,

still treat each guest honorably.

He may be clearing you out

for some new delight. 

The dark thought, the shame, the malice,

meet them at the door laughing,

and invite them in.

Be grateful for whoever comes,

because each has been sent

as a guide from beyond.”

Once you begin to see each emotion as a guide towards something much greater than yourselves is the moment of great truth and clarity. Sometimes it is difficult to view the emotions that cause us a great deal of anguish as something positive but once you place your entire trust and faith in God, it comes easy, even naturally. You begin to welcome every emotion as if each one brings a new message, a signal from beyond.

let your emotions

guide you towards

the unknown.

you do not yet know the joy

in not knowing.

 

Degrees of Love

I have gained your love
and lost my heart in return.
I wandered across many lands
in search of you
and now you are finally mine.
I waged wars against myself and others
just so I could have you.
It is only after the despair of separation
that I now know the sweetness of closeness.
Tell me,
could anyone else love you like this?
I have given way to madness
and lost myself in you.
Without you, oh beloved
I am lost in the oceans
drowning under the waves
not even fighting for air.
I pray that every bad dream
never turns into reality.
You are all that I see
All that I can hear
All that I can feel
All that I can taste
I have filled my senses
with you
and without you
I am senseless,
hysterical like a madwoman
who has lost everything.